IMITATION OF LIFE

Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them. 
James Baldwin

A few days ago, I posted a question. What is your definition of a healthy relationship? I only had one person to respond. Maybe it was a topic that people were not interested in discussing or maybe a lot of us are just clueless as to what a genuine healthy relationship looks like. It is no wonder why our children are immersing themselves in unhealthy and risky partnerings. 

We are constantly bombarded by the media with negative relationship images. It makes it very difficult for our young men and women, not to see this as a norm. It would seem that true healthy relationships are an enigma. We like to argue that it is just entertainment, but the more of these images that you watch, the more influence it truly has on your psyche. You may think you don't internalize it, but may find yourself utilizing reality stars catchphrases in your everyday life. Yelling, "Getcho Life," then wondering, "Oops! Where did that come from?" Your mind has absorbed it and most importantly, so have your children's. 

Saddening, is the fact that not only are our children using these images as ideals to emulate, but we as adults are attempting to emulate them as well. We are quick to criticize when our youth don't make the "right" choices, but in all honesty, the apple doesn't fall too far from the tree. Trust, they notice.

Women, when you choose a man over your children, you are teaching your daughters that they must seek the attention and validation of a man at any cost. You are teaching your sons that women have little to no value, because they can be bought for cheap. Men when you physically and verbally beat down a woman, you are teaching your daughters that they have no self-worth and this is the kind of treatment that she should expect. You are teaching your sons that the only way to exert control is through violence. And yes, these situations can be reversed. There are men who choose women over their children and there are women who use violence to exert control.

What is my definition of a healthy relationship? , I Corinthians 13:4-8, “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. (ESV)

If nothing else, it is definitely a blueprint for having a healthy relationship, but the most important part of this entire process is making sure that you are "healthy" and whole before embarking on a journey for someone to complete you. No one can complete you. Only you have the power to do that.

Living and Loving Now....

WHY TIME2LIVE LIFE IS RIGHT NOW...

Transformation can only take place immediately; the revolution is now, not tomorrow. ~Jiddu Krishnamurti

Whether you know it or not, life is a full-participation sport. To get anything out of it, you must put something into it. Passive voyeurs will watch as life swiftly passes them by.  At times, life could be considered a full contact sport. We are in a constant collision with forces that will either make you stronger and greater or that  will eventually wear you down. The way to win at this ultimate sport is to shout, "NEVER" in the face of defeat. Never let the troubles of this world defeat you, if your goal is to live a life of purpose, a life of joy and happiness. 

How many of us have had dreams or aspirations of doing something, only to have someone close or dear to us tell you that it's all folly. That well-meaning or not so well-meaning family member or friend may have advised you that there will be plenty of time for that, whatever your "that" may be, when your older, your children are grown, you have a degree, or a good job, or more money, etc. One day you look around and it has been 5, 10, 20 years later and this thing is still nagging at you, but now you feel "stuck" in a life of what others help "plan" for you and not the one you planned for yourself. Now those same people are telling you that you are now too old for that foolishness. The truth is that there is no perfect time than right now. Perfect situations do not exist, we must create them.

To create these situations, we must become more self-aware. We must gain self-knowledge. By knowing who you are and what it takes to be the best you, you will be able to create your own "perfect" time. Although others may feel that they are giving you the best advice, they are giving you the best advice based on their experiences and no two peoples life experiences are the same. They may have limited knowledge about your passion, so they base their advice on their limited knowledge. You must also realize that these people are human too. They have fears and doubts just like you, so their advice could be based on their fears, some judgments, and/or even their values system. 

Be an active participant in your life by becoming more self-aware and self-confident. It is the key to a more happy and fulfilling life. For tomorrow is not promised nor your next breath......

Living Now...